Bad joke

Max, standing right next to me pees all over the toilet. needless to say he got in a little bit of trouble.

After a lecture from me, he goes downstairs and apologizes to Jeff who had to clean it up.

Max: I am sorry I peed on the potty and not IN the potty.

Jeff: Why did you do that?

Max: (shrugs) Well, I was just trying to be funny.

Things that are True

Max is playing upstairs. Jeff and I are just having our coffee...

"MOM, DAD, I GOT VOMIT!!!"

Sure enough. He did have vomit.

He knows how to get things done.

Max: dad I want some chocolate milk.

Jeff: Okay in a minute.

Max: dad I found your watch!

Jeff: Thanks Max (reaches for the watch)

Max: (pulling away watch) you can have it when I get my chocolate milk.

Updated from my phone by hudson.... part two

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updated from my phone by hudson.... part one

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birthday wish list

I some how convinced Max to give me the time of day during cake.

I asked him what he wanted for his birthday.

Max: (EXCITED) I want the toy shopping cart at Target!!

(suddenly remembering that shopping trip. sad)But dad said I can't have it.

Me: (knowing why)why can't you have it?

Max: (heavy sigh) because I ran away in the store and I got in trouble. (pouty lip quiver) so, I guess I won't get anything for my birthday.

Me: oh sure you will. What else do you want for your birthday? let's make a birthday list.

(I write the list silently, apparently Max was worried that I'd get confused.)

The list:

* A BIG toy lion. It's not a real lion, but it is a big toy.

* A big toy elephant. But not a real one, just a toy one.

* A little toy airplane. Red. And blue... Red and blue with a flag on the top.

* A little toy race car. I want it blue. Not a real one. A toy.

* A toy princess with a red face and a blue dress.

and a strawberryvanillacake birthday cake.

so, armed with this list I'll shop this week.

Hopefully I can remember that he wanted the big toy lion, not the real one.

dissed.

Having cake... Mom is hoping to bond after a rough evening.
"so what did you do with nana and papa today?"
"um, lets just eat our cake."

More bathroom fun.

This is a belated post.

Max comes out of the bathroom laughing.

Max: I peed in the cat box!

Me: Max, don't do that. (not the first time)

Max: But (laughing... here comes the punchline!) I thought I was a cat!!

Things that are True

A friend told me this story. Funny the things you find out about your kids.

First of all, I had no idea he knew what marbles were.

Max: Why are you wearing marbles around your neck?

Alex: Well, they beads and they are actually made of wood.

Max: Wood beads? Oh. (beat) I have a car, it's made of plastic.

Alex: Oh!

Max: And I'm Max. And I am made of person.